Warm and Cold on Inquiry

When I first went to the parish to ask about the conversion process, I had already done a little homework. I knew that there were stages, and that it took over a year. What I wasn't prepared for was the Flow Chart of Faith that I was given. That's not its official name but it has arrows and circles, and it brought back buried memories of standardized tests in grade school. The chart starts with Inquiry (circle) to Right of Acceptance (arrow) to Period of Catechumenate (circle) to Rite of Enrollment (arrow) to Period of Purification and Enlightenment (circle) to Sacraments (arrow) to Post-Initiation (circle). It seemed such an overly simplified way of expressing a process for adults which will hopefully be both intellectually and spiritually rigorous. Perhaps this was a sign.

Right now I'm in the circle Inquiry. Which means I go once a week to a meeting where one or two full fledged Catholics answer open questions from anyone who happens to attend. There is no structure to the meetings, and the group of inquirers is in constant flux. There are about three of us who go regularly, though I have been slacking off lately b/c I'm just not getting as much out of it as I thought I would. The group is lead by volunteers with varying knowledge. God love them they do their best, but often in an effort to not offend anyone sometimes they come off as advertising for other faiths. When the topic turns to anything controversial the Episcopal church always seems to come up as the fix. So if you have problems with the Catholic church's stand on divorce or women priests or homosexuals then just go to the Episcopal church. No one seems willing to really sympathetically explain the Church's view point on any of these prickly issues. Abortion hasn't come up yet, though I shudder to think what will be said when it does.

I'm coming to the Church looking for a more conservative faith with a long standing intellectual tradition which isn't swayed by the latest issues. I don't think I'm the only young person looking for a more orthodox faith. But it feels like the sales pitch is still geared towards my parent's generation, one that wanted no restrictions, no guilt, no firm traditions.

We've regularly gone around the room and had everyone say what faith they grew up in and why they're there. Since I was raised Jewish, I feel like everyone tenses up and then tries not to say anything potentially offensive. I've even had leaders ask me about the Jewish perspective on a particular issue. It makes me want to scream, "I'm here b/c I want to be Catholic! Go ask a Rabbi!"

Not to totally knock Inquiry, we have had some really knowledgeable leaders. A Dominican brother lead the session a few times, and he really explained some tricky theology to me, unsanitized. And our lay leaders have done a good job talking about Marian devotion and the importance of confession. I just wish that we had more leaders like the brother who really owned the tradition controversy and all.

How can you win over converts if you're lukewarm about the Church yourself? I don't know if this is a sign of what it is going to be like as I move along on the flow chart. Wish me luck.